I can’t believe the last Splines wedding was 18 months ago! It’s well past time for another one.
I started by making all the necessary preparations. First, the usual shenanigans involved in creating a wedding cake:
- Bake a white cake
- It’s not in the “bake” menu
- DON’T EAT THE CAKE
- Set the cake on a table
- A little to the left
- This isn’t working, let’s try the other table
- Add a cake topper
- Put it back into your Sim’s inventory
Then I planned wedding outfits for Joaquin and Morgan, and bought a wedding arch and put it in Morgan’s inventory. I was pleased with myself for remembering to tick the “goaled event” box to make their wedding a goaled event. And then there was the choice of venue.
As I discovered last time, the “plan a wedding” interface gives you a long list of venues to choose. Most of these are public spaces, like a museum or various parks. But there are also a few venues which are just some person’s house.
If you select someone’s house as a venue, they don’t have a say in the matter. You just show up at their doorstep unannounced with up to 15 of your closest friends, with a cake and a wedding arch in your pocket, and they’re like, “Sure, come on in!”
Obviously I’m only ever choosing that option from now on.
![Gia Maher sits on her couch watching TV Sims 4](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-12.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
The wedding party arrived at the Maher residence (Brooks Bridge Borough in Glimmerbrook) at 9 a.m. to find Gia Maher sitting alone in her living room watching television.
![Gia Maher sits on her couch watching TV Sims 4](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-11.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
“There’s a wedding at my house? Right now? And I’m sorry, who are you again?”
![Maher house Glimmerbrook Sims 4](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-10.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
I put the wedding arch in the kitchen, because that’s the only place it fit. Please take a moment to savor this house’s utter and complete lack of any type of decoration. Each room is lit by a single ceiling lamp. The effect is somewhat less celebratory than one might want for a wedding, but no matter! Let’s call it “ambience” and move on.
![Sims 4 wedding non-binary](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-08.png?resize=600%2C448&ssl=1)
Joaquin and Morgan married in the kitchen while everyone else stood around the barely-furnished living room, chatting or just staring into space.
![Sims 4 non-binary wedding](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-07.png?resize=601%2C451&ssl=1)
Immediately after the wedding, Joaquin took a nap in Gia’s bed. I don’t blame him! Weddings are exhausting! Maybe he could have taken off his silk top hat first, though?
![Sims 4 taking a nap on a stranger's bed](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-06.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
![Sims 4 mingling in a stranger's house](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-05.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
Everyone mingled, or tried to. A semi-circle of Sims accumulated outside, where it was unaccountably dark for 10 a.m. They stood and chatted, fully ignoring the dirty plate on the ground.
![Sims 4 mingling outside a stranger's house](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-04.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
Guys, we have to at least clean up after ourselves, okay??? Gia doesn’t have a janitorial staff!
![Sims 4 ready for the afterparty](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-03.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
After Joaquin woke up from his nap, Morgan changed into their overall shorts, and the two newlyweds made their grand entrance.
![Sims 4 wedding](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-02.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
Gia: “This is fine and normal.”
![Sims 4 mopping the floor](https://i0.wp.com/thesplinesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/0326-01.png?resize=600%2C450&ssl=1)
Eventually the wedding came to an end and all the guests left. Leaving Gia to clean up her whole entire house alone.
I left the wedding arch for her, though. It was the least I could do.